Willy Pasini

Men Need Love, Too Publication date : May 2, 2008

What has happened to men over the last thirty years?

Some have continued to behave in the old ways, asserting an overflow of aggression, authority and egoism, which no longer seduces anyone — women either run away from them or ignore them, judging their behaviour outdated or inadmissible.

Others have chosen to stand back and wait. Having renounced the “conquering spirit” that gave them their strength, they have developed a form of sensitivity that is almost feminine, with the result that women criticise their passivity and apathy.

How can men today overcome the excesses of these two options — too much or too little virility — and find a balanced identity which they and their partners feel happy with? Willy Pasini argues that, long ago, such heroes of Ancient Greece as Achilles, Ulysses and even the centaur Chiron embodied a successful alloy of masculinity and femininity.

Pasini views these Greek heroes as models for our time who can help men overcome the current crisis. Without misogyny or machismo, he rehabilitates what he calls men's “conquering spirit” in a form that accounts for women's legitimate aspirations and struggle for parity. He defines a subtle equilibrium, for both genders, combining aggression (a prerequisite for conquest) and courtesy (so essential for successful cohabitation).

A psychiatrist, sexologist and psychotherapist, Willy Pasini is the author of more than fifteen books, including à quoi sert le couple?, La Force du désir and, more recently, Le Couple amoureux.